Thursday, February 26, 2009

Hot Off the Wire

Whoo-hooo! My delinquent sister, Gabby, made a break from prison yesterday!!! They had been holding her in solitary confinement on a chain up in Kansas City, but she made a break for it during the black of night and made it all the way down to Republic, MO late last night. She is currently hiding out with our brother, Vader. She had contacted me to see if I could hide her, but, I KNOW about aiding and abating a criminal and I sure didn't want to get pinched for harboring a fugitive, so I suggested to her that she call our brother, because, just between you and me, he isn't as smart as I am. Sure enough, it worked! He told her she was welcome to stay with him, just as long as she lays low, keeps her nose clean, and doesn't get him in trouble with HIS Spokespeople. (We'll see how THAT works out!)

Word has it that she's planning on hiding out at her brother's house until her Spokespeople leave for Alaska in six weeks. Then she's hopping a plane with them. I told her she needs to go to MEXICO to stay out of reach of the law, but she thinks Alaska is far enough out of sight. We'll see. The one thing I KNOW about Gabby is that she utterly incorrigible. We'll see how long the law up in Alaska will turn a blind eye to her wolfish ways!

(This is a photo of the three of us taken the last time we were all together--four months ago. Gabs is in the center and Vader is on the far right. Of course I am the astonishingly beautiful one in the group! Gabs and I have doubled in size since then...and Vader?...he has TRIPLED in size! He's a scary looking dude these days!)


Khyra The Siberian Husky said...

I'm sooo furry jealous of your sister!


Heaven on earth fur my kind!


Ransom said...

wow, Khyra! You are the FASTEST commenter, ever! I think you already have your comment in before I publish my post! How DO you do that?!

Anyways, I hope my sister likes Alaska. I think it is way too far away to be galavanting off to...but she is pretty hard-headed sometimes...

Gabby Pachis Susunaga said...

Dearest Rans....I am so very sorry I have not been able to write you before now. Your words cut me like a knife..well... miss goody paws, our brother took me in..I am hardly a criminal! It is called "survival of the fittest"!! I had to do what I had to do...I couldn't stand solitary confinement any longer!! I was starting to talk to myself and see things that weren't there (like dog treats floating in the air)..I knew I had to make the break. I know you are right...Mexico would probably be the safest...nobody knows me there .. the government is too corrupt to catch me...I do feel as if I MUST go to Alaska because I have awesome search and rescue skills (far better than you ever will)that if my spokeperson gets lost I will be forced to take action..I am trying to forgive them for placing me in solitary has not been easy...but I am dealing with it..thankfully our brother has let me come to his joint for a while.
My goodness Rans..he has gotten so fat!! Do I look that fat? I hardly recognized him! He was the same ol' Vader. The problem is...I have to be on my BEST behavior so I can continue to stay here...only Vader keeps antagonizing I just supposed to take it?? I will be sad to leave him though...bless his heart (between you and me..I don't think he has many friends)..I do think my coming here will lift his spirits..Take care for now..I will write when I can...don't forget me down here..come when you can (I know your spokesperson is really lazy..but if you can talk her into it.. come visit) I am so looking forward to our big trip the first weekend in April..that is what keeps me going..Hey you care if I invite Vader? I think he would like to come..I won't say anything to him till I hear from you first..he needs to get out more..I have noticed the short time I have been here--well, I hate to even say it..but I think he is a little "slow". Maybe we both can help him.
Better go for now...take care!!

The Army of Four said...

Wowzers! What a couple of hot babes! And Ammy thinks your brother is mighty handsome! If you're ever in Kansas, give me a bark!
Play bows,

Khyra The Siberian Husky said...

I'm glad I khame bakhk to see the pikhk of The Three Amigos!


Ransom said...

Goodness, gracious Gabby! You go WEEKS without writing on the blog and then when you do finally start writing again, there's no shutting you up! You are so much like your Spokesperson that it sometimes scares me!

Anyway, I just want to let you know I am glad our brother took you in. Certainly you couldn't stay with your Spokespeople right now when they are being so very unreasonable. I can't believe they pressed charges when you tried to break and enter the house. I mean it isn't like it was a STRANGER'S house or anything! The fact that you had dug a hole the size of the Grand Canyon against the foundation and had torn through the outer wall of the home and were actually caught EATING the insulation (were they really starving you THAT much?!)...was no reason at all for them to go flying off the deep end and condemn you to the chain gang. I'm so glad you are finally off that hideous chain. I KNOW it is all THEIR fault. They drove you to this criminal behavior when they exiled you from the house. What did they expect you to do, all by yourself, alone in the backyard. Of course you would try to break back in, even if it meant eating a hole through the back wall of the house! I wish your inconsiderate Spokespeople would just hurry up and get that house of theirs sold so they could go back to being reasonable again and not freak out at every little dog hair they find floating through the air. Who knew when they shampooed the carpets they were going to decide to never let you set foot on them ever again. Totally unreasonable and unpredictable...that's what those two Spokespeople of yours are. I think you'd be better off ditching them when they move to Alaska!

As to our dear brother...I know what you mean. He has a heart of gold but he never was the sharpest knife in the drawer. I think all that puppy chow turned his brain to fat! Just between you and me, though, sis, its actually pretty handy having a brother that isn't as smart as we are. I mean, after all, if he'd had any good sense what-so-ever, he would have never agreed to let YOU come stay with him. I mean, you and I both know how insufferable you are. Besides, you are currently a wanted FELON...that, in itself, spells nothing but TROUBLE.

I've been thinking about how poorly I am treated by my own Spokesperson. I've had an offer to join better families in Pennsylvania and in Australia. I'm seriously considering those options...but, if neither of those work out, it is a comfort to know that I have a brother in Republic who is dumb enough that I could talk him into letting me crash at his joint if worst comes to worst!

You KNOW we drive him crazy whenever we are around him. He just never got the hang of bullying like you and I did. You would think he could do a better job of standing up for himself now that he is twice as big as either of us, but he's just too soft hearted for his own good. Guess that's what makes it so fun to pick on him! Still, as crazy as we make him, you would think he would have at least STALLED when you ask to hide out at his place. Guess he just isn't smart enough to out-talk you! Which means he certainly will never be smart enough to out-talk ME... Nice to know I have a fail safe back up plan! Like I always say, having a big, dumb brother is very advantageous!

Hey, and did you read the comments above? Sounds like Ammy is smitten with Vader. I guess he IS a rather handsome big and strong...girls always seem willing to overlook a lower IQ when it is coupled with good looks and an athletic build...and he IS built like a line-backer!...and, he does have a coat to die for (even nicer than YOURS, Miss Gabby)! And it sounds like Zim is interested in YOU, Miss Gabby! I myself, don't have time for such tom foolery, but I know things like being noticed by the opposite sex has always been important to you, Gabs.

Joey said...

I'm not exactly sure what's going on, but all three of you are gorgeous, and the little ninja is very cute, too.

See ya!

PS. Khyra is amazing, isn't she?

Gabby Pachis Susunaga said...

Hey sis, a quick note before I hit the sack...Day one with Vader has been awesome...I have really missed him and we have had a blast...I even overheard his spokesperson say how wonderful I was (I am glad she finally realizes that!!).

Ransom said...

Glad to hear you are on your good behavior, Gabs! I heard you and Vader had fun on a walk tonight, too, with his Spokesperson and his Ninjas!

I'll try and get down there to see you two, SOON!!!

Suzuki said...

Yay Gabby!
You are certainly the best looking of the bunch Ransom! And Mum said you should do some practise swims first before trying to get over here, she doesn't want you to drown!
Big licks to you

Snowball said...

Hi Ramsom,

Thank you for visiting my blog. You and your siblings are all very good looking. I heard that Alaska is really cold and dogs with double coat would love to be there. Me for one might need to put on tons of clothes and hide in the hooman's jacket in order to survive there. I have never experience winter. My country only has summer.


Peess: May I know why did your hooman name you Ransom? Are they prepared to free themselves from kidnappers by giving you to them? :P

Ransom said...

Nope! They just figure if someone were silly enough to ask for ransom, they'd say, "Ransom? You want Ransom? Here's RANSOM!" At which point and I would leap through the air and tear them limb to limb!