Boy, I don't get to see ANYTHING of Oldest Ninja these days...save for the few minutes early in the morning when she comes out to feed and water that lazy, delusional Newfie, and the half-crazed, hyperactive border collie and myself. She was tied up at an away soccer game, getting her face kicked in and just generally having a fine large time without me, all evening yesterday....and here it is way after dark tonight and she still hasn't made it home yet from her away track meet. At least she did take a moment to call me on her cell phone between events to announce that she ran her best time ever in the 800 tonight. She ran it in 25 seconds LESS than her previous best time! Of course she placed in the event! And no one kicked her in the face tonight! Whooo-hoooo! That Oldest Ninja sure does LOVE track and soccer!
...Speaking of getting kicked in the face...I had a REALLY CLOSE CALL myself recently that some of you might not now about...
Last weekend when my incorrigible sister, Gabby and I met up at our dad's house, we wound up in what could have been a very dangerous situation...all because of Vader's little people. (You know, my LAME brother, Vader, the one who won't even bother to come up to see me even when his PEOPLE are coming?!...yeah...THAT brother!) Anyway, his two little people nearly got goofy Gabs and I KILLED. Yes, I did say KILLED. It was horrific.
One minute Gabs and I were just sitting there happily chewing the fat together and the next minute there were Vader's two little people dragging around a long, thin, dry thing with googly little eyes. At first we were both highly interested. I mean, who wouldn't have been? We even thought he looked like he might be a fun guy to play with. Vader's little people certainly seemed to being having fun with him. Oh the innocence of little people!
What none of us realized (then) was that we were eye to eye with the one of the most dangerous menaces of the cybersphere, Mr. Stick!!!!! Think, MANSON...think DAHMER...think--well, you get the idea! True to his devious nature, that horrid, splintery Mr. Stick started STABBING at us with his sharp pointy end when we least suspected it! Its a wonder we escaped injury! Gabs and I tore into the hideous little beast and, last I saw, he was running away through the weeds squealing in that high pitched woody little voice of his! Horrid Mr. Stick...he better not EVER show his googly eyes anywhere near me EVER again!!! I'll show him how we FETCH sticks around HERE!!!
You should keep your own eyes peeled...rumor has it this sneaky stick is showing up all over the place, endangering innocent dogs everywhere...
Vader: Available for Stud Service -
3 years ago