Expanding My Taste to Include Literary Works

My dog buddies all seem to have their priorities in line! Yes!...I did find my food pan and Oldest Ninja is back to feeding us as always! (The food pan had food in it that had gotten really yucky--all swollen and soggy--but that wasn't a problem. The half-crazed Border collie and the Lazy-as-all-get-out Newfoundland gobbled it all down while I was gone checking the damage in the front yard and accompanying the Spokeswoman on her rounds, so I got a pan of fresh, crispy food! The Spokeswoman told me she had planned on trashing the soaked food, but those greedy-guts I live with had already snarfed it all down! Hah! Joke was on them!!!

The Spokesguy spent a great deal of time yesterday evening clearing blown leaves and debris out of the roof gutters. He was using books to adjust his ladder and left them out when he came in for supper. I found them quite tasty! I thought I looked rather scholarly running through the backyard with an open book grasped in my jaws! It was a lot of fun until the Spokeswoman spotted me out the French doors. She is such a stingy, selfish soul. The Spokesguy shares neat things with me only to have the Spokeswoman yank them away from me. I've noticed that in life...how OPPOSITES attract. Have you? If you ever see two married humans and one is really sweet, patient, generous, and kind--almost invariable he/she is matched up with a much less likeable soul! At least that is how it is in our household...one mean one and one sweet one...one loud one and one quiet one...one pushy one and one unassuming one.

Any ideas how I could get the Spokesguy to dump the Spokeswoman? I don't know why he is so bonded to her. It remains one of the burdens I must bear.